Jalsa

The foodie is back after a hiatus of a couple of months. After moving back to Bangalore, I was really looking forward to an authentically authentic North Indian cuisine. My mind was full of restaurant names I use to frequent 3 years back and I wanted to go to all of them at the same time. Our first visit was to a restaurant nearby, where we knew the food was tasty, but unfortunately they had stopped serving alcohol. Somehow, it has become an unwritten rule that thou shall commit a sin if thou shall visit a restaurant that does not serve alcohol. So, obviously we could not eat there. When we came out, a friend suggested we go to a place called 'Jalsa'. Having never been there, it was a consensus to go there.


The place was a direct lift from the sets of the movie Jodha-Akbar. The place had an ethnic look to it and the waiters were dressed like descendents of a royal family. For someone who wants to have a Kingfisher beer, beware, they serve only KF Strong, which somehow does not go with my taste buds these days. Anyway, being the accommodating person I am, I went with KF Strong. I would not mention a lot about the vegetarian stuff, as I did not have much of it, but others who did order veggies were very impressed with it.

Coming to the 'real food', we were only two of us who were meat-eaters. So we ordered half a tandoori chicken. Half the chicken was divided into two pieces. Very juicy and the spices were so so right. As we started digging into it, we realized how tender the meat was and how easily it came off the bones and melted in our mouth. The mint chutney, served along with was a treat as well. Once we polished that off, we were keen to sample the mutton Dum biryani, but to our bad luck, all they had was chicken biryani. Not to be de-motivated and disheartened, we ordered a chicken biryani. This was served in a 'handi' (mud pot) with the traditional raita. On top was freshly cooked and the aromatic basmati rice. As we dug into the mud pot, we got all the masalas and three tender, juicy pieces of chicken, completely immersed in the spices. Now this biryani was so relishing that it comes very close to my own benchmarks for biryani (Empire restaurant in Bangalore or Fishland in Hyderabad). We ate a hearty meal with just one bottle of beer to go along with it.

This place does loose out slightly on the monetary side, as it did turn out to be a bit expensive (Rs. 500-700 per person). A place to go on a birthday or anniversary or other special occasions, unless someone is like me, where every meal of the day is a special ocassion. We did not have the appetite for anything sweet. This place is on the ring road, close to Marthahalli in Bangalore. A must visit for all food lovers.

Happy Eating!!!

26/11 and my predicitons

I am not an astrologer. But this one time I can bet on my predictions. This one time I know it will come true.

It is the beginning of November. Very soon we will have the first anniversary of the 26/11 attacks in Mumbai. Let me provide everyone an insight to what will happen on the run up to November 26, this year. There are different perspectives we can look at. I think we would be better off examining the key parties, rather than target what individuals would be doing.

Government – our self proclaimed leaders would address some gathering, in some part of the country. They will reiterate that after 26/11, they have beefed up security on all quarters. They will blame our neighbours and say that we will not tolerate any such attacks on our motherland. They will make sure to include the names of the deceased like Hemant Karkare in their blown up speeches. And of course, there will be a one minute silence at the beginning of the session, in both houses of parliament. They will announce gallantry awards for the ones who fought last year.

TV Channels – These days our TV channels go berserk for anything and everything. Every channel will show footage of what happened last year. All channels will rewind to a minute by minute happening of the massacre. They will show the map of Mumbai and point with red dots, the places where the events unfolded, along with the timing of the event. The commentaries will of course be done by people who can really make a mountain out of a mole hill, just by using their high pitch voices. They might also take a gun and walk into Dadar station or even hire a boat and sail through fisherman’s colony and then say our security is useless.

NGO’s and few socially conscious organizations – they will not have anytime during the day, as they have their work to do, which earns them their bread and butter. In the evening, they will hold a candle light vigil at the incident spots. They might all gather together and walk up to Mantralaya or the commissioner’s office or some other spot. They might then present a memo to some government babu, signed by 25000-30000 people asking the government to take steps to ensure this does not happen again. Then go home, watch the TV channels and sleep off.

Defence chiefs / Defence minister / Home minister – They need special mention, although they do form a part of the government. All of them together will condemn last year’s attacks. They will tell about what they have been doing to ensure such incidents do not happen again. But one of them will also say that as the ‘anniversary’ of 26/11 is approaching, they have intelligence inputs that such strikes might happen again and all forces should be alert. There will be extra security at airports, parliaments and other places frequented by government babu’s.

Police / Commandoes / Soldiers – these are the guys who fought bravely against extremist forces, last year. Just another day at office for them.

Common man – will be afraid to step out thinking about what happened last year. The warning signals from the defence chief’s only add to the fear. He will go to work, come home, keep changing TV channels to see the coverage of how events unfolded last year, eat, pray that he escaped and sleep off.

Kasab – He will be congratulating himself on being successful on living off the tax payer’s money for a full year. He will be thinking of new ideas and thoughts. May be he should change caterers. Everyone needs a change. Or may be ask for his case to shifted to the international war crimes tribunal. But most important, continue to live and enjoy all comforts from the tax payers money.

One can understand all of the above people reacting in different circumstances, except one. I do not need to point out which one. Such is our judicial system, where someone from our neighbouring country rides a boat and comes to our land. He opens fire, kills a few people but gets caught in the process, red-handed, but our government is still examining witnesses and filing schedules after schedules and documents after documents.

Probably by 2030, this incident will be part of the CBSE history syllabus. Once upon a time a man named Kasab, rode a boat and entered Mumbai. He opened fire at a railway station and killed many people. Alas!!!everyone ran helter skelter. Our police caught him and arrested him. He was lodged in Arthur road jail. And then he lived happily ever after.

Now can anyone bet this will not happen??????

Udipi Palace

When we hear 'Udipi' only two things come to our mind. One is the Krishna temple and the other is idly-vada-dosa-sambar. Now definetly I am not talking about the temple here. Udipi Palace is a small South Indian eating joint in Kingsbury, in the county of Middlesex. Very soon, the county of Middlesex might get an award for serving the best Indian food in London.

Well, having eaten there many times, I have always stuck to dosa and vada(sambar and chutney is taken for granted). The last time I went there to get a takeway, it was lunch time on a Sunday. The restaurant had advertized in bright colors 'ready meals'. That immidately reminded me of the 'Darshini' or the millions of Andhra eating outlets in Bangalore. So I ordered a takeaway lunch. The smell on the walk back home was intoxicating so say the least. I just could not wait to try the food.

The 'meals' had 2 chapatis, decent helping of rice, rasam, sambar, two veg curries, dal, butter milk, yoghurt and pickles. Overall it is good enough for one person to eat heartily.

I started with the chapatis, dal and veg curry. The taste was amazing. Nothing fancy, but as close to home cooked food as it could get. After the chapatis vanished in no time, I pounced on the rice. Now the best way to eat rice, rasam and sambar is using your hands. First I started with some rice and sambar with the other veg curry. Instantaneous comment was 'super'. The pickle with the sambar and rice jelled like a piece of pineapple on a vanilla cake. Once the sambar was over, the rice and rasam was equally delicious. Of course the left over rasam can be taken as a drink as well (without the kicks). Then came the butter milk. It was not great in quantity, but top notch quality. Reminded me of the days in Bangalore when the best drink to quench the summer afternoon thirst is 'majge' (butter milk).

A hearty experience and the restaurant guy is now friends with me. The next time I went to buy medu vada, he gave me some 'bajis' (pakoda) to taste, as that day he started making them for the first time. Customer loyalty always get rewarded.

By the way, the entire meals costs only GBP 4.00. Defintely worth every penny. There is a abridged version of the meal available for GBP 2.50, but when you go for the meals, go for the full one, so you also feel full. The restuarant is opposite Kingsbury tube station on the Jubilee line. Yeah !!!!!! it could be a nightmare to get there over the weekend, but all efforts are duly rewarded.

Pati, Patni aur Woh

Reality shows seem to be the in-thing with our TV channels these days. Every channel has a show and everyone seems to be following some show or the other. Rakhi Sawant seems to be the queen of reality shows. First it was Big Boss, then Swayamvar and now Pati, Patni aur Woh. And with every show she has become intolerable.

This new show ‘Pati, Patni aur Woh’ has all the ingredients to spoil your evening. Five celebrity couples are put through the motions of everyday life of the common man – raising kids, caring for elders in the family, working and earning money and doing household chores without any help available. Clearly goes to show the ignorance and naivety of our celebrities and the artificial world they live in.

Anyway, currently they are bringing up kids who are 6-9 months old. Their real parents monitor their children through video conference, sitting in the next room and can interfere if they think something is going wrong. I feel sorry and pity for the children who have to put up with the tantrums of their celebrity foster parents, rather than the other way around. Also, how would parents have the heart to put their child through such an ordeal? Why would parents keep their children away from them, voluntarily and then moan and cry? Would any parent be calm and composed if told that they had forgotten to give their child, the medicines it needs to be given? Would anyone take an answer that they forgot to read the manual in which the food habits of the child are clearly mentioned? The real parents of these children are putting up with the reel parents on all these points. There can be only one answer to this question of why. “Money speaks honey.” They are compensated well for putting their children through this ordeal. They all come from well-off families. So why would they want to put their child through this? The answer is pure greed. One of the parents proudly told the media that their child got an offer for a movie, after being seen on this show. So, till the child has commitments like school, make them earn some bucks. Contentment and living within means is slowly but surely vanishing from mankind (no offense to women. Making sure before I get sued for discrimination).

Highlights of the show:
- One lady called her mom and asked her how to make plain rice.
- Another lady keeps cursing the baby that it eats so much
- One of them keeps hogging all day and I have never seen her husband eat
- One of them cries that she misses her other half. Where is he? Gone to work for 4 hours a day
- And the icing on the cake has to be Rakhi Sawant, who openly says that when she gets married to her Mr. Right, she wants to have only one kid and then will undergo ‘nasbandi’. Wow!! But there seems to be a mismatch of.. you know what.

Now I have BIG question. What on earth is our government, IB ministry and the thousands of NGO’s we have doing? If a middle class household employs a child in their home that is a crime? If poor people send their children to work, that is a crime? If our diwali crackers are manufactured by children, in the factories of Sivakasi, that is a crime. The government cracks a whip in all these situations. Middle class people, who genuinely need help and are willing to pay for it, cannot employ a child. Or if parents are poor and want to send their children to work, to make ends meet, cannot do so. Then why are well-off families allowed to use their children, to make money? Why is the government allowing such parents to let their child to be on such a show? Why is a TV channel allowed to employ children less than 14 years?

The law states that children less than 14 years should not be employed in hazardous working conditions. Now who defines non-hazardous working conditions? I know people who have hired less than 14 year olds as domestic helps. The environment and working conditions are much better and a blessing, as compared to what is provided to the child on this show. If a child working in a cracker factory is hazardous, then not feeding the child properly or making the child bleed on the show is also hazardous. Why can’t the government put an end to such ludicrous shows? Why does the government have a two-faced attitude? It is a shame that the mass needs such shows to keep them entertained. It is a shame that we have fun at the cost of others.

A parting word of advice for the ‘celebrity’ couples who have been given jobs in a hotel so that they can earn money for their so-called family? If you are given a palatial, fully furnished house to live in, without paying rent, without paying any taxes, without paying for utilities, without paying for transportation, having a car at your disposal, having medical help at your disposal and given Rs. 3000/- per month, I think majority of Indians would love to swap roles with you, considering that’s what the per capita income in India is and with the burden of all living expenses. So stop cribbing and get you’re a** moving!!!!

Austerity, my foot

Finally the UPA government realized that it also needs to do some cost cutting. This is something which should have been ages ago, but better be late than never. But this show of austerity will yield results only if done properly. Else this will go down as one of the many cards, which politicians play to garner votes.

The leader of the UPA setting an example is definitely the right step in this direction. But the whole implementation was completely a lost cause. One can and should travel by economy, but if you have two seats next to you on either sides and behind you empty and blocked, then, madam is better off travelling by business class, where she can get her own so-called space to work on important matters, which are a matter of life and death for citizens of the country. Plus, if she really wanted to show austerity, she should be sitting in any seat between 15 to 25 and not the first row, which provides extra leg space. That is how the cattle class travels. It is understandable that she would not know this as she seldom steps out of 10 Jan-path in anything other than an air conditioned, bullet proof convoy. Who paid for the additional empty seats? We did. And how do the airlines recover the cost? Simple, just increase the price for others. So we, the taxpayers foot the bill for those additional seats plus pay more for our travel. We'd rather be better off paying for a business class seat. We are in the situation of the devil and the deep sea. Whichever way, we are screwed.

She even got the support of her son. He travelled by Shatabdi express. Since when did the air conditioned coaches of Shatabdi become a show of austerity? More than half of the travelling public cannot afford the Shatabdi in our country. If he was so keen on garnering support from the common man, by showing austerity, then he should have been sitting in one of the normal trains, using his own handkerchief to wipe the sweat off his forehead and buying a ‘Kinley’ or ‘Aquafina’ at more than the MRP price. Thats what the common man does. But our man chose to sit in the comforts of an air conditioned coach and having made-to-order breakfast.

Well, if the UPA government really wants to be in sync with the common man, then they need to do more than just talk. Actions speak louder than words. This cannot be an exercise to garner votes. This is something which should be inculcated into every politician in India right from the day he joins a political industry. If you cannot provide a certain standard of service to the public, then you have no right to enjoy the same service with our money. The government should remember that they are not doing a social service by being the government. It is a job, for which they report to the public. We pay their salaries and benefits. And our money is not meant to be wasted on frivolous stuff.

Something for our Indian TV channels and newspapers. You mentioned that Rahul Gandhi had for breakfast on the train. He enjoyed the bread omelette and the parantha. But how come no one told me what Sonia Gandhi had during her flight? Was it a parantha or was it the south Indian idly-sambar or the maharashtrian poha? Did she drink lime juice or orange juice? And did she whack 25 sweets from the air-hostess like a child would do? I just cannot wait to know. Please please someone tell me. And if you cannot, don’t bother. It will not be the end of the world for sure.

Unions, strikes and lockout

Last couple of days, I have been reading about the strike by pilots of Jet airways, which has caused nothing but inconvenience to the common man. Do such people who fuel such agitation, even realize the repercussions? How much of inconvenience it would have caused to travellers? People would have missed official meetings. There would be some who would have been travelling to catch international connections. There would be people travelling on emergencies. Last month, all airlines wanted to strike, if the government did not bail them out. Such is the sad state of affairs in our country, that a small group of people can hold the entire country to ransom, for their own selfish motive.

A strike is never a solution to any problem? A strike takes away more than what it attempts to give. It affects the people who pay for a service through their hard earned money. The airlines will refund the cost of the ticket. But can it refund the time; effort and tension passengers go through, to get themselves on another flight? It goes way beyond monetary compensation. All other airlines, whose pilots were not as coordinated enough to induce such a preposterous action, would be running to the bank. They are no less selfish in cashing in on the already stressed out passengers. Can someone please explain the reason for ticket prices increasing manifold? I do not buy the thought that it is a demand-supply situation. The number of people flying in India was always minuscule and supply was always more. Shrewdly putting, other airlines have resorted to a practice which is as close to hoarding and black marketing as it can get.

No one would agree, but the coming together of Kingfisher and Jet, to share maintenance facilities, ground handling facilities etc. was the biggest cartelization of the airline industry in India and no one could nor did do anything about it. According to what the media reported, majority of the passengers who had to cancel their Jet tickets went to KF. The result of the so-called cartelization is clearly evident and we as common people can do nothing about it but pay the sky high prices and travel.

What will it take for us to realize that when we stop doing our work, it not only affects us but trickles down to other parts of society? When will we ever get over the communist tendencies? Have we not lost enough in the past, due to communist leadership? We are a democracy, where everyone has a right to speak their mind and to do what they want, but only to the extent it does not become inconvenient to others. With rights come responsibility and it is high time we realize it and move on and away from communist ideologies.

By the way, all the striking pilots should be fired and new ones hired. As it is due to the recession, there aren’t enough worthwhile jobs to go around. Atleast this way, people who want to work will get work and those who want to create a nuisance can continue to do so. Fortunately in India, the government does not provide a ‘dole’ for unemployed people. Instead of striking, let us get on with our jobs and talk it out to sort out issues. There are no issues which cannot be solved through a mutual dialogue. And let us not trouble anyone for our personal interests.

High time we have some regulation controlling strikes and lockouts not only in essential services but in each and every sphere of the economy. The government on its part needs to provide better compensation and benefits to all PSU staff, else what is applicable to majority of the PSU staff, should be made applicable to the ministers. After all isn’t the government also a public sector undertaking?

When I gave up a Kingfisher beer !!!!!

Over the last bank holiday weekend, we took a trip to Sandown, on the Isle of Wight. Overall, the trip was excellent, but thats not the point here. During this trip, I gave up a KF beer for something else. For the first time I said 'no' to beer and I did not repent one bit.

Well, the highlight of each of my trips has always been the food. And not one trip goes without having one Indian meal. There is a strong bond between Indian food and myself. Wherever I go it follows me or wherever Indian food is available, I reach that place. On the way from the station to the hotel, we spotted an Indian placed called 'Swad'. It had a sunday buffet and we thought that we should go there the next day.

So next day lunch time, we entered the place. It was a decent sized restaurant, with a fair number of people. As went in, we were greeted with a "namaste and aiye, aiye'. We took a table in a corner. I fail to understand why I Indian restaurants outside India think that they attract an audience in the name of bollywood (read Himesh's nose), instead of concentrating on good quality food alone. Anyway, we had a look at the buffet, which had veg samosa, rice, naan/roti, matar subzi (green peas) and Masala alu (potato) for the veggies. For the non-veggies there was lamb samosa and chicken curry. The chicken looked amazing and something in me told me that we were upto something here. So I just took rice and some chicken curry. I came back to my table, completely slaushed in the aromas of the chicken curry. The first mouthful was absolute bliss and I realized that I was right and we were upto something brilliant. The small pieces of chicken was succulent and just about well done. The spices had hit every nook and corner of each chicken piece and the curry was spicy, a bit on the higher side for UK standards. As I was about to go for a second helping, the waiter/owner asked me if I wanted any beer or any drinks to go with it. He said he had KF. Now for beer lovers like me, a KF in the UK is nothing else than India having non-corrupt politicians. But I was so mesimerized by the chicken and wanted more of it, that I had "no, thanks" for the beer. I rushed for a second helping of the chicken curry and rice. It was followed by a third and then a fourth helping. I was cautious of the beer filling me up, so that I would then be able to have less of the chicken curry.

This has to be the best chicken curry that I have ever eaten in the UK. It reminded me of 'Delhi Darbar' or the other restaurants in Delhi that serve chicken curry. My best half asked me how the chicken curry was, as I hadn't spoken to her in the last 15-20 minutes, sitting on the same table, I said 'this chicken curry was so Delhi'. That was enough for her to understand how I felt. I told the guy serving our table that the chicken curry was just too good and absolutely brilliant and that it reminded me of Delhi. Tad came the reply, "saab, hum Malviya Nagar mein khana banathe the aur ab yahan. Lekin hain dilli waale aur sab masala bhi dilli se laathe hain (sir, we use to cook in Delhi and then now here and spices come from Delhi). And by the way, this chicken curry experience cost us only 5.99 GBP per head.

I was so so so so thrilled and happy and satisfied. I knew the chicken curry was something familiar. I felt like I was eating in 'Saddi Dilli' and I was so right. The chicken curry rocked as much as Delhi does........... Anyone going to the Isle of Wight and wanting to try this place, give me a shout for directions...................... and I let out a big burp (sorry) - that was the chicken and not beer for a change !!!!!!!!!!! cheers.....